That day was in spring.
–it is actually not, I never count the date nor care about the season. Time passes just like flying dust.
But that day, I see oceans, I see flames, the spring breeze, and the smell of burning sun craving under my nose.
That day, there’s a boy, standing so proudly and arrogantly, raising his chin so up, looking down at me. How wonderful creature he is– I thought.
Then we grow up. Bathing in blood, mud, and dirt. But still together.
Surrounding by bickering, screaming, and fighting. But still together.
The time that I found in boredom passed just like a flash in my eyes.
The boy that his existence itself manages to erase my longing for death grows up like a flower. Blooming beautifully. Attract the bees flying around him– which makes my stomach twist.
As usual, the world would always destroy everything in front of its eyes.
That day when my caramel eyes met bloody rain, the bomb was thrown up against us. We crumple. So I run. And run. And run. And run. And then lost.
I’m hiding from myself from the yearning for the other presence.
While the books in my small hiding place don’t smell musty and porous yet, I found a home. Far away from the beautiful flame that once I craved.
While trying to breathe, which feels like a shattered glass stuck all over my lungs, I clung to the spark that I stole from the latter.
But once again, the red string that chains us dares to lay its hands on us. It’s disgusting. I feel so itchy.
–it’s not, though. It feels amazing.
The boy whose fire I’ve stolen, still flying and dancing in the sky just as like I remember.
The time of mine that once paused for a moment started its clink again.
Though, now is barely a winter. But the cold embraces us like a mother longing for her kids.
We see each other in each other’s orb. Keeping unspoken words and desires locked underneath our skin. It doesn’t matter though, we read each other like an open book, just like we usually are.
Human is a plaything for a world, that one, I am so sure about. Because another disaster like quicksand tried to steal me away from him. Even so, I let it.
I hear him scream my name.
–was it worry? Or amusement?
He settles his hands to rescue me.
Blinked slowly and beaming, I welcome him. But he falls. I let him. I was grinning.
He’s drowning. And drowning. And drowning. I’m still grinning.
He’s gone. I’m still grinning.
The time of mine eternally stopped. I’m still grinning.
The feeling of half of my soul forcefully pulling away pained me. But I’m still grinning.
D.
